Thirty Three Point Three Percent
by Ally612
Summary: Because one third of your life affects you. A what if story, where Derek is not McJerk and McHot gets a real chance. Edited August 14, 2009.
1. In which we find them in a bar

Disclaimer: I will not claim that I own Grey's Anatomy. Because if I did, Meredith probably would have drowned (I'm kidding, people), Denny never would have died, Finn would never have been dumped, and Prom never, ever, ever would have happened. Oh, and the show would probably be called Addison's Anatomy.

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Author's Note: This oneshot (for now, anyway) was sparked by the what-if scenario that we all face. Especially after seeing the cute Addek scenes in the bonus features of the Season Two DVD. I always thought Patrick and Kate had so much more chemistry with each other than anyone else they have been paired with on the show. And I was deeply saddened to see their marriage end, so I'm giving this little present to you. A what-if.

Do enjoy, and do review!

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There was a soft Christmas carol playing from inside of the bar. Derek caught only the strains of it as the door opened and closed, happy people stepping into the bitter cold of the night. The sounds of laughter and clinking glasses met his ears and despite himself, he found that he was smiling. He could see Addison from the window, though she hadn't seen him yet. She was bent over a catalog, her lips pursed in thought, her red hair falling over her face. Her hand was poised over a picture, her eyebrows raised, before she finally marked it. Probably with a star, Derek found himself guessing, her symbol for a strong possibility. The door opened again, a bell tinkled, and he found the courage to move closer.

Swallowing and trying to summon his courage, he opened the door for himself and stepped into the bar. He relaxed a little as the warmth and comfort of Joe's flowed through his chilled body. He looked once more towards Addison, his lips bowing into that half smile that only she could bring to his face. That smile that was part exasperation and part amusement, a smile reserved only for Addison. He knew her well and he knew that right now, she'd just found the perfect present, probably for his mother. She'd been nervous about it all day, hovering about him anxiously, so unlike her normal, poised self. She'd always been amazing at picking out the presents for his family, she somehow knew what his mother liked, what Nancy, Kathleen, Laura and Gigi all liked - that was no easy task. For starters, Derek's four sisters were as different as night and day, their only similarity being the same piercing blue eyes and impossibly dark brown hair he himself had inherited. Addison had been particularly stressed about what to get his mother. Carolyn Shepherd had never really warmed to Addison, even after several years of her being married to Derek. Now, his mother thought that she'd been proved right, that Addison had been an adulterous snob all along. She'd done nothing but talk her down to Derek since she'd found out.

Derek shook his head, hoping to dispel all unpleasant thoughts and made his way to the bar, smiling at Joe.

"Hey," Joe smiled, putting a glass on the bar.

Derek found his spirits lifting already. Joe could have been a real ass to him after the way he'd played Meredith. He winced at the memory of the whole debacle. He'd been furious at Addie, looking for any escape. But what he'd done, he was just now realizing, was bad, maybe even worse. Adultery was a filthy word, and he'd thrown it at Addison myriad times. She could have thrown it back, he was coming to realize, but she never had. She had winced, maybe even yelled, but she'd never called him on his hypocrisy. She wouldn't be Addie if she did. She didn't fight dirty, she was fair.

"Merry Christmas, Joe," Derek responded, taking off his gloves and pushing them into his pockets. He opened his mouth to order his drink, but there was no need.

The familiar sound of liquor meeting a glass was both soothing and promising, easing his nerves. What he was going to say, well, it would take courage and alcohol was definitely called for.

"Double scotch," Joe stated, "single malt." He capped the bottle and slid the glass to Derek, waving his hand dismissively at Derek's wallet.

"You're a good man," Derek responded gratefully, holding his glass. Joe _was _a good man, he'd never left his wife, had an affair, he _was_ a good guy.

"Hey, Dr. Shepherd," a feminine voice interrupted. Derek didn't know whether to wince or to smile. He felt so many things for Addison; it was confusing as hell to respond to her attempts at fixing their marriage. In the beginning, he had felt duty bound, his ring was like an anchor, pulling him underwater, sinking him deep below the surface. But now…the surface was coming into view, he could almost breathe again.

Derek shared a look with Joe, who looked both amused and sympathetic, and turned to face his wife, raising his glass.

"Dr. Shepherd." He mused inwardly about all the times they had played this game, calling each other nicknames, teasing, laughing. There had been so many good times, years of good memories. When had it gone wrong? Why had it gone wrong?

Addison shuffled her catalogs into a precise pile and carefully tucked them away, with a surgeon's eye for order. He took a gulp of scotch, feeling it burn all the way down. He made his way to the table she'd chosen, a small table, just for two.

"So," she smiled, "how's Mr. Epstein's frontal lobe?"

He was momentarily stalled in his thoughts. She'd always shown a keen interest in his cases, always had a suggestion, a comforting word or a way of helping him grieve. He couldn't remember the last time he'd asked after one of hers. Derek set his drink on the table, pulling out his chair.

"He woke up smiling," he responded, a smile on his own face.

"Congratulations," she smiled wider, raising her glass to him, looking down to stir at her drink.

"Thank you," he said, really meaning it. When his patient had woken up, screaming at his kids, Derek had been horrified. When Stevens had suggested that his bitterness had caused it, he'd been even more so. He'd had to let go of all of his feelings to heal, and the significance of that had shocked him. He'd played a CD of Christmas carols, a CD that he and Addison had made for their first Christmas as a married couple. He could still remember chasing her around the house, making a lasso of tinsel, kissing her under the misteltoe until she'd left him breathless. Those happy memories had guided his hand and led to a family regaining their loving husband and father.

"What are you drinking?" He asked her, a playful tone creeping into his voice on its own. He leant over and looked into her cup as she laughed.

She spooned some of whatever it was into her mouth, lauging again, daintily wiping her mouth.

"It's, uh, hot buttered rum," she told him, her eyes dancing, "it's delicious."

"It's Dickensian," he bantered, knowing how much she loved Dickens, especially around the holidays. Christmas was Addie's holiday, and when he'd met her, it had become his too. He'd never liked Christmas after his dad had died. Christopher Shepherd had been the glue of his family, a jolly man who had loved Christmas with his whole heart and soul. When Addie had come into his life, their first Christmas together had been when he realized how much he loved her. She had been the one who had turned it back into the magical and wonderful holiday it had been before. With her smile, her infectious laughter, her inability to gift wrap anything that wasn't a perfect square and her knack for getting tangled in the strings of lights and somehow dragging him into all of it, she'd given the magic of Christmas back to him, to him and his whole family.

"No," she protested, before giving in, "well, yeah, but it's Christmas. Christmas, Derek, we _love_ Christmas." Her eyes implored him, wanting him to tell her he still did love Christmas, but when he said nothing, she looked away. "At least, we used to…"

"Yeah," he sighed, looking down for a moment, staring at his wedding band as if it would give him all the answers. He gathered his courage and looked back up at her. "Christmas makes you want to be with people you love," he told her, his face composed.

She looked at him, hope dying in her eyes, her lips trembling before she pressed them together.

"Addie," he entreated, placing his hands on the table, "look at me, please."

She shook her head resolutely, one tear marking its way down her face.

"It's why I'm with you."

She sat up straight, her head whipping up to face him. Her eyes went wide, though they did not stop watering.

"Derek," she whispered, "do you mean that? Because, I really need you to mean that. You can't say stuff like that and take it back..."

"Addie," he tried again, "I love you. And I'm not saying it's all going to be perfect, we're going to fight, and I get to be hurt and angry sometimes. But I'm not going to stop loving you and I'm not going to give up."

"Derek…" Addison was openly crying now, though there was a smile on her face, however small. "I don't know what to say, I mean, I come here and I try to make it work, but all I'm doing is hurting, and I know I messed up, I do, but I _love_ you and--"

"Addie," Derek interrupted, trying to soothe her, "one day at a time, okay? Right now, the only thing I can do is promise you that I will love you and I will keep fighting for us, for this. So, if you could be patient with me…if you could let me heal and let me fix us in my own way…"

"Whatever you need," she gripped his hand tightly, "I don't want to lose you again, Derek. Once was bad enough, but I couldn't do it again."

"You won't lose me," Derek promised her, looking into her eyes seriously. Her face was pink from crying, her hair was falling into her face and he tucked it behind her ears. Using his thumb, he wiped at the tears that were leaving a trail down her face. Leaning over, he cupped her face and kissed her gently. She smiled against his mouth, hiccupping with a choked down sob, and Derek slowly pulled back. "I can promise you, Addie. For better or for worse," he twisted the rings on her finger, "I'm yours."

From the bar, Joe looked on with a smile on his face. He had a good feeling about those two. The way that Derek smiled at his wife, the way she looked into his eyes so intently. Their mannerisms were so in tune with each other, years of marriage displaying themselves subtly, like the way he guided her out of the bar, one hand in the very small of her back, the way she tightened her arm around his waist and how her head fit directly in the crook of his shoulder and the way they both moved in for a kiss, directly in sync.

It looked like Meredith wouldn't be getting her McDreamy back anytime soon.

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Depending on the response to this, I might consider adding more oneshot what-ifs. Reviewer requests, of course!

Thanks so much!


	2. In which we find them naked

Disclaimer: Like I said before, Grey's Anatomy is _so_ not mine. If it was, do you think that the show would be heading the direction it is? That Derek and Addison would be over? Seriously? _Seriously_.

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Author's Note: I was overwhelmed by the response my little drabble got. You guys are great. I'm glad the Addek support is still going strong. McMarried will prevail! Or Addison will continue to be her fabulous self…

Here's a continuation of the what-if…

Also, please note that these will not be in any sort of order, just in the order that the inspiration comes.

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Addison winced. That had to be the worst sex ever.

No exaggeration.

She had heard that married sex was bad, but this was just terrible. Especially for them, Addison and Derek, the super couple. It's not like there were any technical difficulties. Everything was in working order, despite the sensitivity left over from the humiliating attack of poison oak. Addison still hadn't recovered from the embarrassment left over from _that_ incident. Miranda Bailey's smirk as she asked about Addison's trouble "downstairs" was almost too much to bear. And she had to deal with the intern's snickers as they watched her walk, checking for the return of that awkward gait she'd been sporting that awful, awful day.

Seattle Grace could go screw itself, she decided. She was Addison Forbes Montgomery-Shepherd, she was fabulous and she didn't give a hoot about what anyone thought of her.

But, back to the disastrous sexual experience she'd just, well, experienced…she winced again.

"Thanks", she offered. It was a tentative open to a conversation. Conversations were something that Addison and Derek were horrible at recently. Conversation and sex were pretty much the established basis of marriage. The fact that neither were going spectacularly did not bode well.

To her surprise, Derek laughed. To make matters more confusing, it was that laugh that she had fallen in love with over twelve years ago, that nerdy, horse-whinny laugh that fit Derek's personality to a tee. She hadn't heard it directed at her in nearly a year and a half.

"Oh my God," he forced out between chuckles, his hands waving about, gesturing wildly, his tone incredulous, "you're thanking me for the most boring sex ever?"

Addison found herself laughing too, despite the awkwardness of the situation.

"I didn't know what else to say," she admitted, her cheeks pink with embarrassment. "I mean," she started earnestly; "you did your best." He _had_ done his best, but nothing seemed to be working, all night or all morning.

"Oh great," he turned towards her, a smile in his eyes, "thanks, you too." He touched her arm, pretending to be sincere in his thanks, like he had received a gift. "Nice work," he finished softly. She trailed her hand up and down his arms, her nails lightly scratching him.

"We used to be really good at this," she protested, turning fully on her back, smacking the covers. Suddenly, she sobered. "We used to be good at a lot of things, Derek." Her words were quiet, but their impact was not small. Addison hated to be the one who made them talk, who prompted the continuation of their conversations, the one who chased after Derek.

"Yeah," he agreed, sounding surprised, "we were." He turned to face her, his eyes searching, his mouth drawn sadly. "I forgot. Isn't that just ridiculous? We had some amazing times together, Addie. And not just a few either, we had _years_ of good memories…how could I just forget that?"

"I don't know," she murmured in reply, one hand tentatively hovering over his. "But, maybe, it was easy to forget. We got busy, too busy, too comfortable, too successful. Every procedure that went well was another dinner we missed, or another anniversary cut short. I should have told you I was lonely, how could you know that when we both worked such ridiculous hours and only paused for a cup of coffee or a quick kiss on the cheek?"

Derek looked at her for a long moment, really looking at her, in a way that took Addison's breath away. It had been so damn long since he'd stopped and looked into her eyes for more than a passing moment or to convey his disappointment, disgust, disdain, disenchantment, and any other "dis" word. It had been a long time since they had spoken, really spoken, besides fighting. Sex, well, Addison and Derek had never been ones to neglect matters of the bedroom, the on-call room, the kitchen table, the really spacious shower they'd installed for one reason (one that had nothing to do with being clean), or the back of the car. But the kisses, the careful, attentive way Derek zipped up her skirt or the way she made sure he was buttoned correctly, that had disappeared.

"That's no excuse," Derek responded, his tone accusatory.

Addison flinched. Here it was. The resentment, the coldness, the way he would turn over, eventually rising to dress, shutting her out for the rest of the day. He was going to pull the Mark-card.

"I should have noticed. I was - _am_ your husband, Addison. It was – is – my responsibility to see that something's wrong and try to fix it. What's worse is that I truly didn't see, because I didn't take the time to look. I'm sorry."

Addison choked on her apologies, reigning them in before they escaped. He didn't do it, she marvelled internally. He didn't lay the blame on me. For the first time in a long time, she was shocked pseecheless. Her eyes were wide, her mouth open. Derek took one look at her face and his eyes darkened with emotion.

"Damnit, Addie," he ran his fingers through his hair. "I never should have let it go so far that an apology from me would surprise you like that. That's…, well, there's just no excuse for that. I'm so sorry." He sat up, his head in his hands, his back to her. But this time it was nothing that she had done. And finally, the shock was diminished enough for her to act.

"Derek," she sat up, throwing the sheet around her, scooting behind him, "I slept with your best friend, you don't have to crucify yourself. I fucked this up just as much as you did, probably more. So, really, I should be saying the "I'm sorry's", that should be me."

"Addie," he argued, his voice low, "I'm not about to forget the visual of you in the throes with Mark. I'm just trying to let you know that I was part of the reason you ended up there. If I had been a better husband, I doubt it would have gone that far. We could have fixed us."

"We still can," Addison argued back, fervently, "Damnit, Derek…it's not over yet, alright? We're here, together, in bed, trying really, really hard to have some decent sex. And now we're trying really, really hard to have some decent conversation. So, maybe it's just me, but I think we're on our way to fixing things."

Silence prevailed in the trailer, long enough for Addison to think she'd gone too far, that this might be the end, that the apologies were a way to soften the blow, to tell her that he was done, that he was going to have some really mind-blowingly good sex with Meredith Grey—

"Yeah," Derek agreed finally, his voice ragged, "I think we are too." He turned back over, maneuvering them both until he was hovering directly over her, his lips pressed faintly against hers. "I think that we've got a real shot, Addie," his breath was hot on her face, his eyes blazing with hope. She arched her back, pressing close to his chest.

"So let's get started," she whispered.

And so they did, that very morning.

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A little smuttier than the last one, but I hope I've kept it tasteful enough. Please tell me what you think!


	3. In which we find them in the shower

**Disclaimer**: I, regretfully, do not own the characters of Grey's Anatomy. I know I wish I'd thought of them. For one thing, I'd be filthy stinking rich. For another, Addison and Derek would be in Hawaii on a second honeymoon and the parents of beautiful, beautiful babies.

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**Author's Note**: Thank you all for your kind responses, I'm so glad you've liked 33.3%! Please keep checking back for updates. Without further adieu, I present to you, chapter three!

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Addison was rambling on about something or another, but he couldn't focus on that, not after what he'd just seen. He opened the shower door and turned the hot water on.

"Get in the shower." Derek demanded, removing his shirt. His mind couldn't get the images out of his head. Seeing Meredith, coming out of Finn's shower, had brought a whole slew of emotions and memories crashing down, filling his head with only one thought.

Naked Addison.

Addison needed to be naked and in his shower. Naked Addison wasn't a panacea or anything, but it could sure fix _this_ problem.

There was just one problem – Addison wasn't getting naked.

"What?" Confusion clouded her features. She fought the urge to surreptitiously sniff herself. She felt like one of those girls in the deodorant commercials. Did she stink? True, they hadn't been able to shower after their morning romp but she'd sprayed on enough Chanel Number Five, hadn't she? None of the interns were looking at her funny, the nurses hadn't been giggling at her…sure Karev had smirked, but Karev was always smirking. No, she decided, Derek didn't want her in the shower because she smelled.

Looking somewhat amused, she demurely refused. Where had this Derek come from? He hadn't been so pushy in a long time. She could only take it as a positive sign – if he wanted her in the shower, well, she shrugged, he wanted her. That could only be a good thing, right?

"Honey, it's a very small shower."

_Play it cool_, Addison instructed herself.

Derek remained singularly focused, as he unbuckled his belt and pushed his pants and boxers down his legs.

"You want to have hot sex?"

_Yes, yes, yesyesyesyesyesyes._

Relief and abandonment filled her at once. She wanted to grab him in a knee-buckling, mind-blowing kiss but settled for a simpler response.

"Thank you."

She pulled off her blouse, loving the way his gaze wandered down to her almost-bare chest, blushing at the appreciation his look conveyed. Stepping out her skirt, she grabbed him in the very kiss she'd previously desired to give him.

As his lips met hers, she couldn't help the moan of approval that escaped. His hands roamed down her back, working off her bra and closing the shower door all at once.

It was hot, wet and exactly what they both needed.

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As Addison toweled off, letting her wet hair fall freely down her back, she questioned her husband. "So, are you going to tell me what that was all about?"

He froze in the middle of wrapping a towel around his waist, turning slowly to face her. He couldn't help but be distracted by his wife. Her pale skin glistened with moisture, her eyes were still dark with arousal and satisfaction, and her lips were swollen from his kisses. Though he'd seen her in a similar state earlier that day, he couldn't help but be side tracked.

"God, you're beautiful."

"Derek, really," Addison felt her cheeks flushing with color. She couldn't help but bask in the attention he was lavishing on her, it has been far too long since he'd made her feel this way.

He smiled, hoping to keep her distracted, to not have to explain exactly what had come over him. He didn't want to upset her; they'd been getting along so much better and the sex was back to being incredible.

"You are, you know. I don't tell you or show you, for that matter, nearly enough."

He came closer to her, making her breath catch in her throat. His eyes were darkening again, matching the arousal they'd shone with just thirty minutes ago. His hands slid up her arms, curling around her shoulders, pulling her body close to his.

She really, really wanted to know what had prompted this sort of behavior from her husband. He hadn't acted like this in over a year. But the kisses he was placing up her neck and the way he was nibbling at her ear made her want to push him right back into the shower.

"Der—Derek," Addison protested, "stop doing that 'I'm-going-to-kiss-my-wife's-neck-and-make-her-forget-everything' and ooooh, hey, I said stop that!" She pushed him away from her and swatted at his hands for good measure. She put her hands on her hips and glared.

Derek's smiled slowly, gazing deeply into her eyes. "Don't you like it when I make you forget?"

"Derek," Addison huffed. "Answer my question, or else."

He couldn't help but laugh a little bit. She really was adorable when she pouted or huffed.

"Or else what, Addie?"

She frowned before replying, "Or else I'll blow up this trailer."

Derek almost laughed out loud. He could hardly believe the difference she'd made in his mood. Only she could do that to him. Meredith could make him feel happy, sad, furious, but never turn his day around with a smile or even with shower sex. Not even the bendy thing they'd done had the power that Addison held over him. And he had to be honest with himself; the bendy thing was pretty damn great.

Addison sat on the edge of their bed, patting the space next to her. He took a moment to pull on a pair of boxers before sitting down next to her.

"So," she repeated, "why don't you tell me tell me what that hot sex was about?"

"C'mon, Addison," Derek whined, "can't a guy get some shower sex without all the questions afterwards? Do we have to do the thing?"

His wife nodded firmly and pressed onwards. "Derek," she sighed, "aside from today, you haven't behaved like this in a really long time, so I'm thinking something's up, something's happened."

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair, nodding.

"I saw Meredith at the vet's, she had wet hair and she was wearing his clothes."

Addison's jaw dropped.

THWACK!

Derek swore, cupping his cheek where his wife had slapped him.

"Are you kidding me, Derek? Are you kidding me with this? You got jealous because McVet was screwing your dirty mistress so you slept with me? That's really great, Derek, really fucking great. I love being treated as a consolation prize—"

Derek cut her off before she could continue.

"Jesus, let me finish, Addison! You're not a consolation prize; you could _never_ be that to me." The look on his face when he said that quelled any hope of a response from his wife. "I saw Meredith coming out of the shower, Finn's shower, but that wasn't what prompted the shower sex. Do you know what today is, Addie?"

"It's Thursday, the 23rd," she responded flatly, looking both irritated and confused, her eyebrows arching and her eyes narrowing.

"I can't say if I'm relieved or upset that you don't remember the significance of today," Derek muttered. "Exactly one year ago, you and Mark…you know." Derek couldn't say it aloud, a nauseous feeling creeping up his throat at the thought of them, his wife and his best friend, naked on his favorite sheets.

"Oh," she gasped, "oh..." She continued on like that, sounding more and more morose with each passing second.

"Addison, Addie, don't be like that!" Derek had postponed this conversation for this very reason. He didn't want her to dissolve into a puddle of guilt, to spend the rest of the week looking apologetic, for every conversation to end with an awkward apology.

"I don't know what to say," she admitted quietly, turning away, unable to meet his gaze. "I'm ashamed of myself."

"Hey," he gently turned her face back to his, "I just—I need to know that you were mine." Derek gave her an encouraging smile. "I know you're sorry, I know you're never going to do it again, I just needed that hot sex to prove it to myself, to you, that I'm over it. I'm over Meredith, I'm over making you pay, I'm over making you think that you need a thicker skin, I'm just…over it, Addie."

They sat in silence for a moment.

Finally, Addison spoke, breaking the quiet that had descended over the trailer.

"Do it again."

He just looked at her confusedly.

"Do it again!" She was more insistent this time.

"What are you saying, baby?" Derek asked his wife, bemused by her demands.

She smiled, tremulously at first.

"For a brain surgeon, you're surprisingly brainless sometimes."

She turned and pushed him so that he was laying flat on his back, staring with confusion at the ceiling of the trailer. She crawled up his body, straddling his hips, kissing her way up his bare chest. Her lips ghosted over his as she repeated her earlier words, adding the final clue, watching his face light up in understanding.

"Make me yours."

He growled and flipped them over, listening to her shriek with surprised laughter before swooping down and capturing her in a long and thorough kiss.

"Do it again," she demanded, as soon as they broke apart.

He smiled widely, his hands moving to rid her of the towel she still wore.

"I will," he promised, "again and again and again and again, for the rest of our lives together."


End file.
